If there is an Eternity, I am Damned in it

This is exactly what Ted Hughes said when he found his wife, Sylvia Path, with her head in the oven.

I was crossing the street this morning and coming towards me was a woman in a wheelchair-not an automatic-she was slowly, struggling to get to the sidewalk. Of course, my impulse was to run behind her, grab the handles and push her to safety. But I didn't. I didn't do a thing. I let the poor crippled lady wheel right pass me and I kept on walking. I did turn around to see another 20-something grab the wheelchair and push her all the way to the sidewalk. Good for her.

I only had a split second to Do The Right Thing. And I didn't do it. On purpose.

I wanted coffee, I was late, I was wearing heels, my nose was running and..... what if the Nazi's caught me?

See? The stakes didn't even have to be that high. You get the idea.

Sometimes, when I hate my pointless job so much, I think about doing something rash. Like selling everything I own and going to a country to hold AIDS babies and wipe the mouths of the poor and the destitute. Then, I remember. I am not a particularly good person.

Perhaps somewhere between Dick Cheney and Jenna Bush. Not overtly wicked, but more of a passive bystander or silent witness..... with some awfully nice clothes.

There was an insane man on the subway. I haven't seen one like him in awhile. Paraphrasing, he said something like this:
"White women look so beautiful! But you are all steak asses! You all sit on the toilet and shit. All of you. White or black. You all shit on the toilet. That's what God says. I'll probably outlive all of your steak asses. Do you think you can bring your clothes with you when you die? Do you think they will come? White women with your steak asses. Why don't you all be lesbians?"

So the whole ride I'm dying of curiosity. Just what is a steak ass?

Think about it.

In the meantime, THIS steak ass will get back to work.