The First Rule of Blogging

The first rule of blogging is don't talk about your blog.

Just kidding.

Back in March, I went back to Fairfax to visit some former co-workers. They asked me a lot of questions about my life in New York. What celebrities have I seen? Do I have a car? Is life really like Sex and the City? One question that I thought to be particularly humorous was if I bought produce and carried them down the street in a paper bag. Apparently, every movie that is based in New York City has at least one scene where a character carries a paper bag with celery stalks and a baguette sticking out of the top. No wonder I'm not a real New Yorker yet!

Product Placement

I certainly am not the first person to write about this, but I feel that I need to admit that I am affected by it. Knowing that the American Idol finale was going to be an hour and a half too long last night, I intentionally waited to tune in until 9:30 PM. I was pleased to catch a performance by Carrie Underwood and only one group performance consisting of the top 12. The group sang two George Michael songs back-to-back, and I was thinking to myself, “Man, I love those songs. I think I’ll download them when this is over. Where is George Michael these days, anyway?” Wouldn’t you know it? It did seem like they were doing an extended version of “Freedom” as they kept singing well past the last “Freedom” in the song; and then, “Ladies and gentleman: George Michael!” And there he was! He definitely looks old, but I was surprised that he even sounded old. His has a pretty distinct voice, especially when he hits the higher notes, but I didn’t hear George Michael’s voice coming from that old man. Two things were explained when Ryan Seacrest came onto the stage after George Michael’s song was over: 1) George Michael has a cold, so that’s why he didn’t sound so hot and 2) George Michael will be touring this summer for the first time in 17 years. THAT is why he was there. As it turns out, it wasn’t a recognition of George Michael and his place in pop music history; rather, American Idol and all of its sponsors and affiliates are trying to get America to remember how much they liked George Michael so that they’ll buy tickets to his tour. It’s pretty disgusting. I mean, yes, I understand it: the same record label to which David Cook will be signed just wants to promote some of its other artists. But I feel cheated! I thought I was simply being treated to some old skool George Michael, because he was once a great pop singer, but no, they want me to BUY something! I read in the paper this morning that they also want me to see that new Mike Myers movie, AND they want me to drink Coke! In addition to the shameless promotion of it own kind by American Idol, I nearly barfed this morning when I opened up CNN.com, and the news told me what movies I should see this summer. (Hmm, is CNN an affiliate of the companies that are releasing the best movies of the summer?) It wasn’t just a blip on the homepage with a link to the entertainment section; it was a huge block on the upper-left corner, which is usually reserved for terrorists, natural disasters, and sex scandals. Are you kidding me, CNN? I was planning to see Sex and the City anyway, but now that you told me to, well, you've stolen my joy! Don't make me throw my Jimmy Choos at you! It’s fucking gross. Anyway, yes, I did buy two George Michael songs off of iTunes before I went to sleep.

"These bands are bottles of bleach. It's beer and lifestyle music. It's like the next world war's gonna be sponsored by ... I don't know, I mean, what?" - Singles